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GLBF Preseason Preview submitted by
Detroit - So, the inaugural draft was quite the event, and now every team has an identity. Let's take a look at how each team is built, and make some likely very wrong predictions for the upcoming season. The East Division Elmira Marksmen:
The Elmira Marksmen had the 12th pick in the inaugural draft, and used it on closer Minyomei Cochran. It was a tad odd to see a closer as the first pick for the Marksmen, but with the next pick, they kicked off the second round by taking ace pitcher Shane Sharp.
Before spring training could even begin, Elmira made sure to lock up Sharp, to the tune of $231,000 over the next five seasons. With an average annual value at only $47,000, Elmira could end up on a very team friendly contract.
However, the Marksmen struggle to get about decent in the rest of their rotation. Jose Ortiz will likely be the number two in the rotation, as he should be a plus pitcher, winning more than he loses. The final three in the rotation, Bobby Thompson, Jimmy Carter, and Chris Martin all all wildcards. While not bad in any sense, none of them are particularly good. Thompson will strike out a fair number of batters, but will have problems with walks. Jimmy Carter will be the opposite of Thompson, a pitcher who will limit the walks, but can be very hittable at times. Finally Chris Martin, doesn’t do anything great, but doesn’t have any glaring weaknesses. He fits the role of fifth starter well.
The bullpen is led by Cochran, who is an early favorite for reliever of the year award. If Elmira is winning going into the ninth inning, the game is all but over. Josh Clark and Jason Loupe will be the other two relievers that Elmira will rely on out of the pen. The rest of their pen is much like the back half of their rotation, won’t do anything amazing, but you won’t see complete implosions often. With the Marksmen having seemingly at worst average pitchers, this should be one of the better staffs top to bottom in the league.
While the arms in Elmira are all solid, the same can not be said for the sticks.
The corner outfielders, Devin Jolly and Vic Templeton will lead the charge from the plate.
Jolly and Templeton, the 36th and 37th overall picks respectively, are both very balanced hitters and would be welcomed additions to most teams lineup.
Elmira’s only other true threat with the bat will be 22 year old first baseman Denny Seghi. Seghi could contend for a batting title, but won’t make a habit of jogging around the bases. The only other spots in the lineup that could possibly be a bright spot are center fielder Tony Guzman and third baseman Sean Barnett, but those are at best, 50/50 guys.
Overall, if the Marksmen pitching can carry them, they have a chance at the postseason. But it’s not hard to imagine some frustrated pitchers after a 2-1 loss. Roanoke Railsplitters:
The Roanoke Railsplitters won the draft lottery and had the first overall pick. They used it on starting pitcher Jeremy Byers. Byers is 23 years old and is widely considered to be one of the best pitchers in the league. With no prior professional experience. Byers will be on the league minimum contract. Besides Byers, there are no standouts in the Railsplitter rotation.
Geoff Hawkinson and Jessie Lovell are both above average pitchers who will give their team a chance to win every time they take the mound. Pitcher Zion Williams was injured during spring training, but should be ready for the season. Williams is a middle of the road pitcher. Jeremy Flores and Jim Ross will both battle for the fifth spot in the rotation once Williams returns.
The Roanoke bullpen is painfully average outside of a couple arms. Closer Adrian Rogers will be a solid closer, but isn’t infallible. Jim Church will likely be called on to get them out of sticky situations. Church has some of the nastiest stuff in the league, but outings without a walk will be uncommon. Reliever Brian Donde sprained his ankle during spring training and will likely miss about a month of the season. His return will help sure up the bullpen.
The lineup in Roanoke will be led by right fielder Danny Avalos, who should find himself among the top of the home run leaderboards come season's end. His fellow outfielder, 38 year old Bryan Longshore looks to keep his production up in his late 30’s and if he can it will be a big boost to the Railsplitters lineup.
Second baseman Mike Van Slyke will be asked to hit lead off and his speed could make him a plus hitter at the top of the lineup. Third baseman Matt Wright should provide some pop in the middle of the order as well, likely hitting behind Avalos.
The Railsplitters look to have a solid lineup. Byers should be a leader in the rotation, with Hawkinson needing to step up as the number two. The bats will need to help out when the back end of the rotation is pitching. If Williams can come back to support Church and Rodgers in the bullpen, Roanoke should have a solid staff. Their offense could be quite streaky. Don’t be surprised if this team goes through a few streaks throughout the year because of it. However, having a stud like Byers at the top of the rotation should help stop any losing streaks before they get too out of control. I expect this team to be competing for a playoff spot. Scranton Thunderbolts:
The Scranton Thunderbolts had the 11th pick in the inaugural draft and used it to take starter Bill Thompson, they then used their second round pick to take another starting pitcher in Randy McDaniel. It was a bit curious to see general manager Freddy Delgado spend his first two picks on pitchers, especially when Philbin’s Park is one of the best hitters park in the league.
Larry Moss should slot in nicely as the third man in the rotation, looking to make his age 37 season one of his best yet. The back end of the rotation does leave a lot to be desired. Andy Freimanis and Andy Gilmore are below average at best, and if the Thunderbolts are in contention come trade deadline time, expect them to be in the market for a replacement.
The bullpen will be led by closer David Cleveland, and Steve Ashley. Cleveland will start out the season as the closer, having some electric stuff on the mound. Ashely is thought by some to be the better pitcher, but will start out as likely the eighth inning man. Mike Rowe and Roberto Coello will be the other relievers that will be put into high leverage situations.
The Scranton offense will need all the help it can get from Philbin’s Park. There are very few standouts in the Thunderbolt lineup. To make matters worse, fifth round draft pick Roberto Hernandez had “elective eye surgery” just a day before the season kicked off. He will likely miss about the first quarter of the season.
In his absence, outfielders Billy Molter and Val Leandro will look to fill the void. Both Molter and Leandro are closer to role players than MVP candidates. One bright spot in Scranton is the catcher position. Phil Boyles, while not a great hitter by league standards, will probably be one of the better hitting catchers in the GLBF.
This team will struggle in the league’s first season. McDaniel and Thompson will only be able to do so much, and with a weak back end of the rotation, any good the dynamic duo can produce is likely going to be wiped away. A standard bullpen won’t affect this team one way or the other. Losing one of their top bats due to non necessary surgery is sure to be frustrating for Scranton fans. With no real pop in their lineup, it will be surprising if this team is doing anything but golfing in late September. Bowling Green Griffons:
The Bowling Green Griffons were able to pick up pitcher Tony Arreola with their second round pick, getting great value with the 23rd overall pick. Arreola is only 22 a and will be asked to help out at the top of the rotation with Jim Latimer. Latimer, checking in at only 23 years old, was the team’s fifth round pick and has shown improvements over spring training. It will be hard to say which one of the two young guns will head up the rotation.
Jeremy Middlemas and Ted Van Leer are tasked with being the middle of this team's rotation. Both project to be nothing better than average. However, a ruptured UCL suffered by starter A.J. Megee will sideline him likely until past opening day 2021. In his place Bubba Glanville will try to steady the back of the rotation. If he can be average, it will be a win for the Griffons.
The Griffons strength will almost certainly be their bullpen. Their closer Jose Lopez will try to shut the door for Bowling Green. Brian Delph, Travis Henson, Eric Kenison, and Blake Marlow would have spots in the back end of any GLBF bullpen. Putting them all in the same uniform will spell trouble for opponents. This is the strongest pen in the East, and possibly the entire league.
Center fielder Carl Stasiak, who caused quite the stir when the Griffons took him second overall, is looking to prove his worth. Stasiak could arguably be the best defender in the league. Along with his outstanding defensive skills, he has quite some pop in his bat. There to help out Stasiak is left fielder Randy Haley, who will draw walks and hit balls out of the park at an equal rate. Ricky Jaime will be a third bat in the lineup that can go yard at any point. Those three should prove for a formidable three-four-five in the lineup. However the rest of the lineup is filled with nothing special. If outfielder Josh Hughes and second baseman Andrew Hodges pull their weight, this could be one of the better lineups in the league.
Bowling Green doesn’t have a glaring weakness in its 25 man roster. As long as the injury bug stays away, I expect this Griffons team to be among the best in the league. The value they got out of some of their mid round picks will pay off this season. The Central Division Dayton Huskies:
The Dayton Huskies spent their first round pick, the ninth overall on pitcher Ron “Doogie” Schwartz, who will head up their rotation. Schwartz is a very well rounded pitcher who will be a very solid anchor for the Huskies rotation. Unfortunately, for the Dayton faithful, there is no clear number two. 25 year old Joe Santana could be the number two, but he will be battling for the spot with Austin Williams and Kelly Wright. Although seemingly none of them would be the number two for a playoff caliber rotation. Kellen Clifton will round out the rotation, although his is just as forgettable as the name Kellen. Fifth round pick Rob Browning blowing out his flexor tendon and missing the entire season doesn’t help matters at all.
Their bullpen is no bright spot either. They do have a lights out closer in Dan Sandler, and 24 year old Ron Eledge is a nice piece, they don’t offer up much more in the way of difference makers. If teams can get to the Huskies bullpen, they will always have a chance to come back.
Now this is usually the point where despite all their pitching flaws, I can bring up their offense to out slug teams. But their offense is painfully average. Their best hitter will likely be center fielder Jon Hicks, but he likely won’t be bringing home any hardware come seasons end. Maybe if 35 year old left fielder Corey Rumpel can turn back the clock, and third baseman Steve Greathouse can prove the scouts wrong, then maybe this lineup will have a little firepower. Their first baseman Corey Terry could be up for the batting title, and does have above average power, but will have to improve his patience at the plate in order to be a serious difference makers.
This team just lacks that “umph”. While Ron Schwartz is a very good arm, he is only one man, and if he has to turn the ball over to the bullpen before the ninth, things could get scary. They have no real star on offense. It will take some improvement, either via young players growing, or by trade if this team is going to dance in the postseason. Belle Isle Bandits:
Belle Isle’s rotation can be described as “good, not great’’. Led by third round pick Mike Ryan, Ryan would likely find himself as a number two in some better rotations. Despite this, Belle Isle signed the 28 year old to a five year extension, paying him around $45,000 per year. However spots two through five are quite solid. Ben Bertuca, Ed DeBaere, Phil Mitchell, and John Talmadge are all about the same skill set, none are really set themselves apart from each other. Bertuca will likely be the number two in the rotation, while Talmadge is the best bet to end up on the back end. The front of the rotation is probably below average for spots one and two, while the three, four and five come out above average league wide.
The Bandits bullpen is just good enough. They spent a fourth round pick on closer Pat Singer and their investment should pay dividends. They can lean on Kennie Tillman and Hunter Greiner outside of the ninth. A few other average arms could eat up innings when needed. Don’t expect to have this bullpen to have a major effect either way.
Belle Isle spent the third overall pick on 32 year old Tyler Tramback, and he very well could be the league's MVP. His contact and power both grade out among the elite in the GLBF. His patience should help push his OBP to the top of the leagues leader boards. General manager Jon Gomez put a collection of solid role players around him. Center Fielder John Roum is a nice piece of the Belle Isle lineup. First baseman Will Costello has a great eye, and decent power, but outside of those two, you’re going to see a lot of platoon in the Bandits order. 40 year old second baseman Jeremy McMillan will spend the first month sidelined with a broken collarbone.
This team has the largest range of what could happen. On the one hand their rotation could pitch solid enough to allow their bats to win them games. But if a few of the pitchers go into cold spells at the same time, this team could see lengthy losing streaks. It’ll be a treat to follow Tramback’s season, they will need to have a few other bats step up if they want to talk division title. Port Huron Patriots:
The Port Huron Patriots will have their rotation anchored by second round pick Jon “Little Rat” Hansen. At only 24 years old, Hansen could be a mainstay of the Port Huron rotation for years to come, if the Patriots play it right. As for the rest of the rotation, it’s... not good. Josh Hamlet was slated to be a top half of the rotation guy, but shoulder tendinitis has sidelined him for the first few weeks of the season. J.J. Williamson is an alright pitcher, but is going to be asked to be in a bigger role than he probably should.
Sung-tae Im, Seth Morrison, and Jordan Raygosa are all players who honestly should probably be in the minor leagues still. This will be one of the weakest rotations in the league unless someone makes a major improvement.
The bullpen in Port Huron should be a plus, but not by much. Closer Jeremy Bradford, while a solid pitcher, doesn’t stack up with the elite in the GLBF. Matthew Holter and Josh Kirkland are two really good strikeout guys that can help the Patriots get out of some sticky situations, the rest are a collection of average Joe’s, not going to kill this team, but don’t expect to see an all star out of the rest of this bullpen..
The bats are where Port Huron will have to win games. Led by fourth overall pick right fielder Evan Mendenall, he seems to be a very good player, but fourth overall might have been a tad of a stretch. Tzu-Jao Eng will be the team's everyday second baseman. He will hit for a high average, whilst not being a liability in the power department. The platoon at center field of Corey Brown and Aaron Getzelman should yield high returns. But it would be surprising if this lineup finds itself atop many leader boards.
This team’s rotation will be the death of it. Having three guys in the rotation who are not major league caliber starters is just too much to overcome. While their bullpen and lineup are both pluses, they are not nearly enough to overcome what may be the league's worst rotation. Even if Hamlet comes back and outperforms expectations, this rotation still will fall shy of average. Expect more losses than wins. Muskegon Riptide:
The Muskegon Riptide got one of the steals of the draft, picking up 32 year old ace Bobby Perry in the second round. Supplementing their rotation in the fifth round with pitcher Bryan Stigall, those two look to lead Muskegon to a Central division title. Jaylen Jones, Bill Adair, and Chris Boyer all round out the rest of the rotation, providing for a decent back end of the rotation. While not the best rotation, it should be good enough to make the postseason with talent around it.
While the starters for the Riptide are very solid, the same cannot be said about the bullpen however. Their closer Jimmy McDaniel ranks among the worst in the league, and unfortunately, may be the best arm that Muskegon has. There are just no other noteworthy arms to talk about. Most of the arms in this pen are extremely forgettable and could be the thing that holds this team back. I expect to see moves to bolster the bullpen come if they are anywhere near contending this season.
The Riptide spent their first round pick on first baseman Chris Brill, who hits for contact and has elite patience, and also possesses a very strong power stroke. He will be aided by third baseman Jeremy Rizzuto as the top two bats in the Muskegon lineup. If some good not great players such as center fielder Charlie Fox and left fielder David Murray can make noticeable improvements, this lineup will end up being very solid.
Muskegon is a tough team to grasp. Both the offense and rotation are a plus, but the bullpen is such a negative it may be too much for them to overcome. Being in a weaker division gives them hope, but will have to have a few pleasant surprises if they want to see the postseason. The West Division Rockford Red Hawks:
On to the third and final division in the GLBF, it is the West Division.
Rockford’s rotation will struggle throughout the 2020 season. Led by fourth round pick Rob Mitchell, there is a steep drop off in talent after Mitchell. While Mitchell won’t find himself leading many rotations around the league, he will be asked to do so in Rockford at only 22 years old.
The two and three spots will be occupied by Curt Angelini and Jim Drive, both of whom are closer to the fifth starter in any rotation than an ace. Not too much to get excited about with those two. Rounding out the rotation, Jason Reichenbach and Dave Clow are two uninspiring arms. If they end up with a .500 record at season’s end, the Red Hawks will have squeezed every drop out of them.
The word that can best describe how the Red Hawks bullpen will be used is “patchwork”. They have one of the elite arms at closer in Kevin Perry, and a couple solid arms in Jabari Booker and Kirk Mann, but the rest of the bullpen will have to be used strategically in order to avoid implosions. If manager Geoff Metcalf utilizes this pen correctly, they will be a plus, but it will take a tactician at manager to get it out of this group.
Right fielder John Nickelson was the seventh overall pick and the first one by Rockford. The man known as “Quasimodo” should be in the hunt for a batting title year in and year out. At age 25, and signed to a seven year contract, Rockford has its face of the franchise for the better part of a decade. Helping out Nickelson in 2020 will be helped out by Devin Rumsey, who will challenge for the league lead in walks, but doesn’t lack any power or contact. Outside of those two the only other hitters of note are left fielder Phil Appel, who by his own right has an elite eye, and center fielder Sal Avalos, who will hit for average, but home runs and walks will be rare.
Rockford is another team that is just alright. The rotation falls off quickly, the bullpen is a toss up depending on how it is used. Nickelson will be a mainstay in northern Illinois, and Rumsey should be one of the better first basemen in the league, but outside of that there isn’t too much that moves the needle in Rockford. Expect somewhere around .500 for this club. Peoria Lancers:
Now to the other team from the Land of Lincoln.
The Peoria Lancers spent their third and fourth round picks on starters T.J. Hernandez and Dan Gallagher respectively. While these two aren’t going to be revered as the best one two punch in the league, they will certainly be a very respectable duo. Josh Patton should slot in the third spot of the rotation nicely. Jayden Neighbors is right about where a fourth starter should be, very average. Jimmy Fair will be the final man in the Lancers rotation, and he could likely hold water in that spot, but shouldn’t be leaned on for big games.
The back end of the Lancers bullpen is extremely solid. Cameron Ingram is another one of the elite ninth inning men in the GLBF. Scott Siravo and Harry Merritt both have extremely nasty stuff that will bolster Peoria through the seventh and eighth innings. Reliever Brian Kinne also has some high level stuff, but will struggle to find the strike zone, and limiting long balls.
While Rockford has Nickelson, Peoria has their own bat that will lead their franchise for the next seven years. Bob “Lumpy” Jackson will play third base and is an all around hitter who will likely be in the MVP race for years to come. First baseman Vince Baird should hit over .300, giving Jackson someone to drive home. Peoria fans will look for left fielder Joe Clark to hit a high number of home runs. Center fielder will be a key piece if this team is going to be successful in 2020.
This Peoria team is good. Not great but good. They should end up with more wins than losses in 2020, but if that will be enough to take the west will be seen. Lumpy Jackson will be a fun player to follow this year, and could win the Most Outstanding Player award if Peoria brings home hardware. Thunder Bay Salukis:
The only team from the Great White North, the Thunder Bay Salukis surprised some experts when they took Zane Lemus 10th overall. While a good pitcher, being picked in the first round seemed like a bit of a stretch. They did help out their rotation when they got good value taking J.D. Dominguez in the fifth, who some think may be the ace of the Saluki staff. Victor Vazquez can be a suitable middle of the rotation guy. But Thunder Bay will need to find another starter for this rotation to be considered that of a playoff team. Fidel Alvarez and Joe Hillestad will both hurt this team and will lose more games than they win.
The bullpen is the weakest spot of this team far and away. While there are no overtly bad pitchers, there aren’t any stars there either. Bobby Siglow will be a good closer, although will blow an occasional save. Honestly, the rest of this pen is just painfully average. Steve DeWald will have the best chance of breaking out of that group, but I wouldn’t bet on it. Another arm in this pen would go a long way.
The sticks in Thunder Bay will be the bright spot. Third baseman Nick Meloche will lead the way on offense. Not far behind Meloche will be the right side of the Saluki infield, first baseman Tanner Gibson, and second baseman Mike Bock. While neither will win a batting title, both will hit their fair share of home runs. A player that may be under looked is left fielder Dave White. White is a very balanced hitter who should be able to keep pace with anyone in the Thunder Bay lineup.
The Salukis’ offense will be the reason they win their games. While the pair of Lemus and Dominguez should do a good job of leading the pitching staff, a weak back end of the rotation will be amplified by a lackluster bullpen. This team will have to hit it’s way into the postseason, and I think they may be able to do it. Lexington Thoroughbreds:
The final team in the GLBF, the Lexington Thoroughbreds will post one of the better rotations in the GLBF. Headed by fifth and sixth round picks Pierce Starnes and Nate Moore, they are both capable number two’s although neither are true aces. The three and four of Ricky Garcia and Frank Jimenez will slide into those roles very nicely. The fifth starter Ben Ayler leaves much to be desired and will be a weak point for this staff.
The Thoroughbreds bullpen will need to be aided by the monstrous Thoroughbreds Ballpark. Closer Adam Lucchese isn’t anything special, and his supporting cast is even more so. Jordan Hawkins has some nice stuff, but that is if he can find the strike zone. Jason Farmer will be a big arm for this bullpen, although his skill set is more suited to that of a role player than of a set up man. Hopefully the defense behind this bullpen can bail them out of some bad pitches.
Lexington made maybe the most curious move of the first round, taking 38 year center fielder Ernie Brindel. While division rivals Rockford and Peoria are taking future faces of the franchise, Lexington spent their most valuable asset on a player who will be out of baseball at the next presidential election. Besides that, their best hitter might be their second round pick, right fielder and much younger 27 year old Tyler Reid. Reid will be a guy who you see near the top of home run leader boards, but you’ll also see him put up some large strikeout numbers as well. Their third round pick, 28 year old Brian Wille, shockingly fell to them at 32nd overall and will provide a solid bat for Lexington. Often forgotten about corner outfielder Terry Greathouse will be a key to taking this lineup from above average, to playoff contender.
Playing in a huge ball park will help the Lexington pitching staff, and maybe that is why general manager Dan Ausdemore used his first three picks on offense. Even though he made the most questionable first round selection, his next two picks helped make up for it. This could be one of the better lineups in the league, but having a large ballpark is a double edge sword. However, expect this team to play meaningful games in September.
Now that we got that behemoth of a preview out of the way. It's now time for some probably going to be laughably wrong predictions.
*I did not look that game generated predictions before I made mine East Division
- Bowling Green Griffons. Record: 70-55
- Roanoke Railsplitters. Record 66-59
- Elmira Marksmen. Record 60-65
- Scranton Thunderbolts. Record 57-68
- Belle Isle Bandits. Record 68-57
- Muskegon Riptide. Record 64-61
- Dayton Huskies. Record 58-67
- Port Huron Patriots Record 56-69
- Thunder Bay Salukis. Record 67-58
- Peoria Lancers. 65-60
- Lexington Thoroughbreds 60-65
- Rockford Red Hawks. 58-67
Woodbridge: "VILE" VIC STUDD submitted by
Stephen Alexander's ears perk up in the ring as if he just heard a gunshot and stops the assault on Ro. He spots Vic making his way down the aisle and takes off towards him. Paisner:
Stephen Alexander charging across the ring!
Alexander leaps clean over the turnbuckle for a suicide plancha
onto Vic on the outside. Suddenly a carved out hunk of wood with nails embedded in the tip
slides out of Vic's right sleeve. As Alexander soars through the air, Vic winds up and connects with a Grand Slam to the side of Stephen Alexander's head. Crowd:
Vic-Stick to the side of the dome! Holy fuck! Woodbridge:
Vic Studd just went yard with!
Vic flips the makeshift bat away like a Korean showboat
before sliding into the ring. Brodie Hanson stumbles to his feet, a mask of blood covering his face. He sees Vic standing in the ring a cigarette jutting out the side of his mouth and looks like he's seen a ghost. Paisner:
Jon Cody charges at Vic with a desperate lariat.
Vic blocks the lariat attempt and drives his fist into Brodie Hanson's heart. Woodbridge:
Brodie's entire body tenses up from the vicious heart punch. Vic grabs him by the back of the head and throws him into the barbed wire ropes just in front the exploding barbed wire table. Brodie hits the barbed wire and spins around getting helplessly tied up in it, dangling just in front of the exploding table. Woodbridge:
Vic's cutting through them like tissue paper! Paisner:
Well they have all been involved in a 2 day long deathmatch tournament. Let's just say he knows how to pick his spots.
Prettybody stops stomping away on Roisin, feeling an ominous presence behind him. He slowly turns around to see Vic taking a pull from his cigarette, staring daggers into the vainglorious one. Crowd:
THIS IS AWESOME! clap clap clapclapclap Paisner:
The atmosphere is electric!
Prettybody makes the first move towards Vic and Vic responds by throwing his lit cigarette into Percy's face. Burning embers fly everywhere as Vic kicks Prettybody in the stomach and drops him with a Studd Stunner. Crowd:
Studd Stunner! Studd Stunner!
Prettybody's entire body starts convulsing, his belly jiggling every which way
. Vic pulls him by the seat of his pants and the back of the neck and runs him towards Brodie Hanson tied up in the barbed wire. Woodbridge:
OH MY GAAAAWWD!!
Vic hurls Prettybody into Brodie, the weight of both men causing the barbed wire ropes to snap and both men go falling into the exploding barbed wire table. BOOOOOOOOOM! Crowd:
HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT!
Prettybody and Brodie roll around the grass in complete agony. Their skin torn to shreds from the barbed wire and burnt to a crisp from the explosion. Some of the hair on their heads and face singed right off. Senior Official Tai Ni Wong powders to the outside and looks on in abject horror. Paisner:
Vic Studd making a statement here in Delaware!
Vic dusts off his hands, satisfied with a job well done and turns his attention towards Roisin pulling herself up in the corner. Her eyes grow wide as she sees Vic marching towards her with purpose. She puts out her hand begging him to stop and pleads for mercy. Paisner:
Oh fuck! Vic's reaching into his pocket!
Vic palms an object out of his pocket as he gets within arm's length of Roisin... then he drops to one knee. Woodbridge:
What the fuck...
Vic opens his hand to reveal a little black box
. Ro freezes. Studd:
Roisin. Caroline. O'Brien. Will you marry me?
Vic pops open the ring box to reveal a wedding ring
. The look on Ro's face can only be described as shock and disgust. O'Brien:
Eww... no. Crowd:
Vic is perplexed, confused as to where he went wrong. Studd:
But baby, I love you! Woodbridge:
It’s confirmed, these past two days have just been a really bad dream. I got really drunk last night and this is a result.
Vic starts to get up and Roisin smacks him hard across the face, slapping the taste out of his mouth. Vic's cheek starts to burn red as he looks up at his beloved. Studd:
You know just how I like it, Sugar Nips. You complete me! O'Brien:
Get away from me!
Roisin leaps over the top rope to the outside. She glances back at Vic who fires back with a grin and shouts after her. Studd:
Great idea angel tits! Seek for us a trysting locale. I'll help you! Wait for me!
Ro scrambles over the guardrail and rushes into the crowd. Vic powders to the outside of the ring and takes chase. Studd:
The two star crossed lovers take flight through the crowd. Roisin comes across an unattended Park Ranger's Golf Cart
and hops in. She speeds away, seemingly leaving Vic Studd in the dust. But Vic yanks a little girl off her bike
and tosses her onto the grass. He hops on the bike and pedals after Roisin post-haste. Woodbridge:
Ummm... is she coming back? Paisner:
Would you come back to where Vic could find you and do God knows what with you? Woodbridge:
Excellent point! And then there were three!
Stephen Alexander begins to come to on the outside, bleeding profusely from the side of the head where he talk a home run cut from a Vic-Stick to match the river of blood flowing down his back. Prettybody rolls onto his back on the outside, the cool grass helping him fight of the burning sensations traveling all over his body. Brodie Hanson remains tangled up in wood and barbed wire. His face a mask of blood and his clothing torn and burnt to shreds. Paisner:
The final three men, ladies and gentlemen. Stephen Alexander, Brodie Hanson, and Percy Prettybody. They made it this far, and you can see the results right now.
Alexander goes to pick up Brodie but he’s just dead weight so he gives up. He goes over to Percy, but doesn’t even try because he knows if he can’t pick up Brodie then there’s no chance in hell he’s getting Percy. Instead, he goes back into the ring and looks for something to do… When suddenly a lightbulb goes off and he begins taking out some of the wood planks, creating a hole in the ring. Paisner:
Now what the fuck is Stephen Alexander doing? He’s literally tearing down the ring. Woodbridge:
I bet ring crew is happy as a motherfucker right now.
He creates a hole covering just about a fourth of the ring, maybe a little less. He then goes back outside, where Percy and Brodie are just getting back to their feet, and he gets a pane of glass. Taking it back into the ring, he places the glass over the hole he just created. Paisner:
So there’s supposed to be mats on the ring. We said “Nah, fuck that, we’ll take away the mats!” So then we had just exposed wood. Now
we’ve said “Fuck the wood, let’s just make it a pane of glass instead.” There is literally a fucking hole in the ring covered with a pane of glass right now.
Brodie tries to get back into the ring and Alexander “helps” him by grabbing his head and dragging him in. Alexander sets him up for a powerbomb, but Percy comes from out of nowhere with a light tube across Alexander’s head! This gives time for Brodie to back body drop Alexander over, through the glass and through the ring! Crowd:
Good fucking god. Paisner:
Through the glass, through the ring, straight to Hell!
Percy barely wastes any time and grabs Brodie, giving him a short arm clothesline. He then picks him up and puts him on his shoulders for a Death Valley Driver. Paisner:
Percy skipping the vertical suplex, I don’t think he can get him up for the Wham Bam Good Goddamn!
He doesn’t drive him down immediately, but instead runs over to the barbed wire fence with the pane of glass center… Woodbridge:
Percy DVD’s Brodie through the glass, through the hanging barbed wire board, and the board explodes as both men crash to the ground! Crowd:
HOLY FUCKING SHIT! BOTH MEN BLOWN TO SMITHEREENS! Woodbridge:
Please let this be over! Please!
Wong rushes to both men and actually pulls Percy away because part of the board is on fire from the explosion. Ring crew throws water on both men, and Percy barely drapes his arm over Brodie.
Brodie Hanson has been eliminated! Paisner:
Jon Cody, Brodie Hanson, whatever you wanna call him, might have just been eliminated from life! Woodbridge:
And we’re down to the final two! Percy Prettybody and Stephen Alexander! Two dark horses in this tournament! Only one is walking away with the Crown of Thorns, and will forever be in the history books!
We see Stephen Alexander is crawling out the hole in the ring, completely covered in blood. Percy is crawling on his hands and knees around ringside, unable to stand. As Alexander gets back into the ring, he slowly makes his way towards the side with the scaffold and rolls underneath the barbed wire ropes to get to the scaffold. With all of his might he begins climbing! Paisner:
Stephen Alexander doesn’t give a shit anymore, he’s climbing up the scaffold again! Woodbridge:
What in God’s name is he thinking? He already went up there, but he left the… weedwhacker… Paisner:
Oh SHIT… I forgot about that. Woodbridge:
Looks like Percy didn’t forget!
Stephen Alexander is climbing up one side of the scaffold, but on the opposite side is Percy, trying to beat him up there. They both get to the top at about the same time, where the weed whacker is waiting for both of them. Alexander is on the side with the handle facing him so he grabs that and simply jabs it into Percy’s face, as they’re both still on the sides of the scaffold, not actually on top of it. It catches Percy pretty good and he crumbles down the side all the way to the ground, awkwardly. Paisner:
Stephen Alexander has the weedwhacker, and he’s heading back down for Percy.
Percy throws himself on the apron and tries to pull himself back into the ring, so Alexander meets him with the weedwhacker inside. As Percy’s getting to his feet, Alexander revs up the weed whacker! Crowd:
I can’t watch this anymore, man. Woodbridge:
We’re almost done! This is the finals! What the past two days have been leading up to! Hell, the past YEAR!
Percy gets to his feet where Alexander is waiting for him with the weedwhacker. Alexander charges at him, but Percy sidesteps him and throws Alexander into the barbed wire fence! Crowd:
Oh thank God! Percy Prettybody inches away from being shredded like a fucking rotisserie chicken!
Alexander is laying on his back at a roughly 45 degree angle off the apron, stuck in the barbed wire fence. Percy then picks up the weedwhacker! Crowd:
This could be his last chance!
Alexander sees Percy holding the weedwhacker, but he still can’t free himself from the barbs. Almost as if he’s accepting his fate, he yells at Percy. Alexander:
DO IT! FUCKING KILL ME! DO IT!
Percy lowers his brows and looks at the crowd, who’s cheering him on. Paisner:
Percy shoves the weedwhacker right into Alexander’s stomach! Crowd:
AH MY GOD! Woodbridge:
Alexander is still up!
He’s still stuck in the barbed wire, and at too awkward an angle to get to his feet. He looks at Percy and scowls, breathing heavier than ever. Alexander:
COME ON… MOTHERFUCKER!
Percy almost looks sympathetic towards Alexander who is yelling at him to kill him. Paisner:
Stephen Alexander told us all that he will have to be killed to lose this tournament! Please don’t actually do that, Percy! Please! Have mercy, Percy!
PERCY GIVES HIM ANOTHER! Crowd:
TWO IN A ROW!
Alexander’s stomach is a bloody mess, with thin, but visible strips of skin missing. He is trying to push himself up off the barbed wire but can’t muster the strength. He looks like he’s losing consciousness. Tai Ni Wong asks him if he wants to quit, and he barely responds by shaking his head. But then… he spits in Percy’s face!
ISPS HANDA VIC OPEN. February 6-9 at 13th Beach Golf Course in Victoria, Australia. Despite the Vic Open being around since 1957, last year was the debut for this co-sanctioned tournament between Each week PGAgolfbets provides objective opinion and analysis on who might win or place in PGA Tour events. PGAgolfbets also provides its own golf betting tips which visitors can evaluate and compare against their own selections.. The website is updated weekly to provide an analysis and general information on Event Form, Current Form and also a weekly Stats Analysis based on course setup and Golf expert Ben Coley previews the ISPS Handa Vic Open, where England's Aaron Rai looks set to contend for a second European Tour title. Recommended bets 3pts e.w. Aaron Rai at 28/1 (1/5 1,2,3,4,5 Vic Open Golf Betting Tips 2020. The European Tour is over in Australia this week for the Vic Open being played at Geelong in Victoria. The event has a women’s and men’s field with David Law ISPS Handa Vic Open Golf Betting Tips. The European Tour has moved all the way over to Australia for a very special event this week the ISPS Handa Vic Open, being played over two courses at the 13
AT&T Pebble Beach Pro-Am, 02/05/2020 Golf Betting on Demand ... Vic Open - Duration: 24:41. Racing Post 2,349 views. 24:41. GOLF GODS FUNNY COMPILATION #golf #funny #compilation #2019 # ... Gregg and Jim take a look at a loaded field and make their DFS picks for this weekend's AT&T Pebble Beach Pro-Am ️♂️ FanDuel Hurry Up is a daily fantasy and sports betting show hosted by ... View Racing Post betting offers on our website. 18+ Gamble Responsibly ... Golf Postcast: Tour Championship ... AT&T Pro-Am Vic Open - Duration: 24:41. Racing Post 2,613 views. 24:41. WHAT ARE ... Bruce Millington, Seb Carmichael-Brown & Steve Palmer return to bring you their golfing tips of the week. The team pick out their tournament selections for the AT&T Pro-Am and the Vic Open. Your ... Golf Clash, Dreaded Dunes - Expert Weekend Rd. - Whose Jesse Both 145 watching Live now Samantha Cockfield in the TAC Towards Zero Clubhouse at the 2018 Oates Vic Open - Duration: 3:44.